I haven't seen you in a while. And by a while I mean over a year now. But I can't blame you, it's not like you wanted to see me anyway. I've been thinking a lot. Too much maybe. But all of this thinking is kind of bullshit, you know? Because when it comes down to it there is nothing for me to try and figure out. I keep on trying to force myself into the place that I have been put. But the harder and harder I try to make it work, I'm realizing more and more that it's never really going to. People here, they're different. They always need someone to like, someone to focus their energy on. And I think by being here I've tried to do that too. But it keeps on not working out. Not that it doesn't work out with the person, it just doesn't really work out in my mind. I can never put together if I really like them or not. And the truth is, I don't like anybody here, and I don't think I'm ever going to. I don't think I even like you anymore. I mean I know you knew. I was obvious. And the question I have a really hard time trying to ask is did you ever like me? At all? You know I don't think it matters now. It's not like it's going to make a difference. I just wish you were here. Because I miss you. I miss loving you. I miss the life I had when I knew you. My memories of you keep fading away, and I'm afraid of losing them. They're all I have left to hold onto. Anyway, I'm sorry for everything, I'm even sorry for writing this. You shouldn't have to cloud my thoughts any longer. If you're out there though, if you're listening I just want you to be able to forget everything I ever did to you. I know you happy, living you're new life and all. I wouldn't want to go ahead and mess things up for you again.