I was holding back tears. The worst feeling in the world. And it's not because you're eyes sting. Because you're throat burns. It's not because you cannot breathe. It's not because you feel the aching of you're whole body all at once. It's because in that one moment you've lost. You have been defeated. It's that one time when you've hit rock bottom. Every thing's over. You realize that things weren't that simple. And I have to say I thought this was going to be much easier than it was. I thought it wasn't complicated. But then I remembered who you where and how this was never going to work. If I want you I am going to have to fight. Fight without feelings. The impossible task of adolescence.